FAIL THE DAY | Failman

*WAPSHH* Top of the mornin’ to ya laddies, my name is Jacksepticeye and welcome to the game of the greatest superhero the world has ever not seen! FAILMAN! the man who fails. This is a game kind of like the troll games, that completely slipped by my radar a while ago, its been out for a very long time, Umm… And I-I just didn’t see it at all! but, somebody yesterday reminded me of it, said that I missed this in the middle of all my,- cause I played all of the flash games a while ago, and I kind of ran out of stuff to do, and somebody said, “here’s one that you didn’t play” that i thought was pretty good, so thank you for that, I cant remember your name,I’m sorry but somebody did message me, i think it was on Tumblr Umm.. So, GREAT, YEAH! more of these games to play, because I really like these so let’s get in.

Failman, you’re lookin’ good! BEAU- ur, a default bank DEAFULT Bank actually, i thought it said beautiful bank NO CASH Okay what do I do? *click click click* can I break the window? the- yah- there I can! I duh… There we go, I got you the money! *Laughs* GOD I’m useless! So, I’m a super hero, I’m assuming… that tries to do good, but ends up doing bad.

Okay… Little Tammy what do you want? A balloon! Ok, here’s the balloon, I got the baloon Im’ma fill the balloon up! And Im’ma give to you and you’re gonna fly away Oh God! Failman saves the day yet again! Look out child running towards traffic! Don’t worry, I will sav… Beeoom! (The kid is very dead ) Next level! Oh she’s all sad! No she’s not sad actually, the music just sounds sad Okay..

Here I am to save the day! I’m-I’m late though… Sorry Ohh!! There we go! I’ll drive slowly across… *Laughs* But atleast these ones aren’t as complicated to solve as the Troll Face one’s YEAH! Mortal Kombat! *Clicks clicks* You’re losing dude! Can-Can-Can I sav… You lose… (FATALITY) Damn It! There we go!! That- That’s me, yes, let’s try again! Failman, save the day How?? What else can I click on? The boy? The console? Failman?! Failman, we need you! There we go!! Never lose again little Timmy, because I, Failman, have broken your TV and…

dashed to– I hope– He doesn’t seem too sad though… He seems OK Next Level! Fail… What’s that?? Someone in that burning building? *Smells* Smells like marshmallows!! Failman! Here!! *stuttering* To save the day Ok, what-what am I doing? Here I am!! Rock you like a hurricane! And it… Ok, it’s giving me a hint Aha!!! Yes! Squirt the gasoline at the building! Oh Jesus Christ! You did it Failman, thank you for saving the day! Shh!! Tell no one! I don’t see what I need to fix in this scenario Oh Jesus! Oh God! No, my friend George! Oh it’s just a Halloween party…

WAYY! that’s a… I’m just dressing up too, guys! That… I’m dressed as… Superman! NOT Superman, I’m dressed as Faiiiilllmaaaaan I can still fly though, that’s pretty fuckin’ cool Ya need water, Okay. I’m a dig water outta the fuckin’ sand Don’t you worry bro! AHA! Use the SIGN! Maybe I should turn hints off… *chuckle* There ya go! Pump ya full of it! Oh, it’s oil… At least he’s not gonna go thirsty anymore. FAILMAN! AWAYYYYYY! *bonk* Shit… I uh… I dropped my headphones. In true, uhh… Failman style. Alf! I see… *laugh* By day, he is mailman By night! FAIIIILLLLMAAANNN *laughing* Umm Okey smokes! I got this. low power you say? Well fear not! Stranger! for… Failman is in the vicinity… Yeh I can’t fuckin’ click on anything else. Hello? Game? Any– uh yeh I know what yer fuckin pointin’ at, but I can’t click on anythin’ else.

Why? Help! surely failing should be easy. Can I do anything in the sky? Anything at all? Please? AHHHH Click the power! FEAR NOT MAN! FOR I! Have saved the day! What more do you need? Than to take power, straight from the grid! *silence* Oh… It’s MY phone now, fuck you dude! HAHA! See? I wasn’t tryin’ to save the guy, I wasn’t tryin’ to give him power, i was tryin’ to CHARGE the PHONE! I didn’t fail, i charged the phone! I may have killed a… man, but that’s fine. Sometimes you gotta kill a few people to charge a few phones! Ohp, OHP! HUZZAH! DON’T WORRY! FEARSOME STRANGER! I WILL HELP YOU ROB THE BANK! Ahh…

fuck, it was just a movie. GOD DAMMIT Why didn’t ya tell me? WHEN I BROKE THE WALL, WHY DIDN’T SOMEBODY SPEAK UP? fine… *stuttering* I’m takin’ on my alter ego DARK FAILMAN!!! Oh No! The cat! It is in trouble! Oho! fear not! FOR I FAILMAN! Will get this cat down! by… cutting this trusty TREE! THE CAT IS SAVED! ONCE AGAIN! FAILMAN has saved the day! I killed someone? Who cares about that?! Did I say I was here to save lives? NO! I’m here to solve problems, I’m like a meeseeks! di, yeh! I’m SUPPOSED to kill some people.

fuckin’ Some o’ you… do NOT get it! Ok? Some o’ you out there “Oh Failman, Failman, YOU SUCK! sometimes you gotta suck… How else would you get the tasty juices outta the– Whats That!? WEDDING NIGHT?! and my FEEBLE little man here, cannot save the day! Don’t worry, Failman’s here! I had to save him he had an F on his sleeve. HAHA! There ya go sir! It will be easier to take the cork off now! see what I mean? I think that one went pretty well nobody died ya got a black eye… but i mean its yer weddin’ night you were probably gonna get one o’ those anyway. uhh I need to give you one as well to balance shit out Oh, no! My fail heart is fail pumping for this fail girl It’s like the BAT thing Its like “Oh no I may use my batarang,I may use my failarang in my fail cave” What’s wrong little cindy? Oh No! Has your Dolly fallen into the ocean? Fear not for I will Getw See! I have to suck how else would I save This girl There we go! You are saved But I don’t feel so good though What was the fuck in that I actually saved the day that time! OH I killed the fish though Nah that’s fine sometimes you got to kill four fish oh five fish to save to save a Girls doll Oh no….

The ducks They crossed the road! ……….. I mean they don’t have to cross the road anymore *clap* *clap* job done I feel Accomplished *whispers* don’t tell my wife Okay What do we do? Uhhhh. No not right click that doesn’t do anything. Ookay. Can I do something to the car when it’s coming? I clicked the car last time… I clicked it last time and nothin’ happened! Here we go! STOP strangers! Fear not little ducks. You are saved! And they crossed the road into the blender factory But that’s OK. Failman saves the day once again. Thank you, thank– No, thank YOU. Thank you, thank you doctor, doctor *laughs* What are you tryna do? You tryna look at porn? Well, you’re not gonna be able to look up much with A, B, C, D, F,… And ‘UNTER’ *laughs* Hmmm… What seems to be the problem? Ahhh… There’s your problem! *laughs* It says ‘Success’! Why is that a fail?! (laugh in game) NO.

Stop typin’ that shit in! HE KEEPS TYPIN’ THE SAME SHIT OVER AND OVER AGAIN! How else you gonna get to… porn/porn.com? F Ohhhh! FAILMAN! There we go! I have helped you search the internet. That’s what we’re all really looking for on the internet 404 Errors. Don’t even worry about it. FAILMAN! AWAY!! How did I fly before? How did they do it? They just put their arms in the air and then they fly away. It’s crazy! I can do this. (dancing?) Let’s just dance! Let’s just dance here, up in the heavens! The swing isn’t even tied down to anything. Ahhh I know what you guys need! You’re on your firs date. You’re all very nervous, you tippy tappy on your feet there above the ground. You can’t even touch your feet off the ground. I know what you need most in life… No, not fucking kisses! What you need most in life is to go around in a circle. Full 360! Here we go! Yes! HOLD ON PEOPLE! LOVE is like a roller coaster! ‘kay. This is a bit creepy… *stuttering* Keep goin’ JESUS FUCKIN’ CHRIST! LOVE!! You know, when you see a couple out in the- in the streets and they’re all kissin’ away on a bench, and then you just come right up to their faces and say: LOVE!! That’s what true love is.

When you yell it from the mountain tops. You know when people always proclaim that they wanna yell their love for somebody from the rooftops That’s what they really mean And then so the next couple you see out kissin’ in the street just go up an go – LOVE! That’s how you really celebrate it. *laughs* THE FASHION BUTIQ! I don’t know man, you’re lookin’ pretty good to me. I don’t think you need anything. Open – close, open – close. There we go I don’t– NO! Stop givin’ me hints! Okay, he’s late. Failman’s here! You’re late. You’re late for the– Ohh, It’s open! And you go, buddy! Ookay. In I go! Ohhh! His date stood him up! So Failman steps in to save the day. What a fuckin’ hero! Hey! It’s me! Ummm…

Failette (??) Ohhhh! Oh, well this is awkward… But now you get two dates for the price of one! I think Failman just wanted to dress up pretty and look good. OK. It’s that such a fuckin’ crime?-No it’s not! If Failman wants to look good, Failman can! We should just change it to FailPerson Why do we got to put labels on things… Ahaa! Now you’ll never be late for anything, ’cause you’ll never actually get there… Oh, you actually need to get the bus. Okay, my bad! Now no one’s goin’ anywhere. Ups! OH NO! He’s gettin’ in trouble! Hahaa! You are safe, sir! Fear not. Failman is here to save the day.

Justin Beaver *silence* I don’t k–, I don–…. Oh, I know what happened! Failman. He was seeing uh pedestrian and trouble and he said: ,,Fear not, I will save you!” And then he saved him and then he realized Uhh, It’s Justin Beaver. Ewwww…. And then he just kicked him… That’s what really happened. Okay. Sir? Oh, okay. There we go! There we go. Imma just fix your car here. Don’t look! Ah, FUCKIN’ JESUS CHRIST! I–, I did it! I–, I fixed it! I mean I did! That’s not a fail! I got rid of most of his car, but I made it aerodynamic I made it light. It’s all carbon fiber now. AND it moved! Failman, more like I’m-gonna-save-the-dayMan… Hell yeah! *chuckles* More like… Fuckyou maaan..

Oh NO! The Sun is being blooded out! I mean this seems like a fuckin’ bigger issue than what I’m capable of… OK. That we failed. Okay, Let’s get on my rocketship! My Failship! BLAST THE MOON! And so it was that Failman took to the skies in his Failrocket And blasted that Fail Moon to smithereens! (FAILMAN – The man who fails!) That’s a pretty fuckin’ sick voice *Jack imitates* FAILMAN – The man who fails I wish my voice sounded like that.

Don’t be sad Failman! You did not–, you did not fail the day! You fuckin’ saved the day I’m–, I’m part of the Failman Army. I want to see him in the next Marvel movie. Not DC though, eh. Keep him away from that. No. That would– that would be the true fail. Put- Put him in a fuckin’ Marvel movie! Ahhh, there – Hints. I probably shoulda turn those off… *laughs* Put him in the next Marvel movie. I wanna see him save the day In his own clumsy way. Maybe he’d actually give the Avangers a challenge for change, because all they do is kick the shit out of everything to put up against. Ha! Don’t worry Failman! I love you! I’m gonna cosplay as him. He looks awesome. And he’s ripped! And he can still fly! That’s not a fail… *laughs* Anyway. That does it for this episode of Failman! That was actually really fun! I really liked that one. That was- That was kinda clever. Instead of just doin’ the all troll stuff here and there That actually felt like something was happening and he actually had a job to do.

I like Failman *laughs* But for now, THANK YOU GUYS so much for watching this episode If you liked it, FAIL THE LIKE BUTTON IN THE FACE LIKE A BOSS!!! And! High fives all round! Thank you guys And I will see all you dudes…. IN THE NEXT VIDEOOOO!.